If It's Not Me, Then Who...?

Today is a much better day for me as I find myself in a higher spirits and loads of positive energy!

I have some mantras and do talking to the inner-self about going through the tough times. 

Shower was less scary even though the hairfall is worse. Here's what I said to myself, "Dear Hair, I won't fear you anymore cos you are actually part of myself, and it's a pity that you can't stay on my scalp for now. I'm gonna bid goodbye to you temporary. Go easy when you fall. I'd be missing you with a softer, fuller regrowth next year. I'll see you soon. Be good!"

And the hair shower went beautifully and more calming. Good job to me!

I've thought it over and over again. Nobody could actually help in making the process easier but myself. So why resist? Why complain and nag? If I've been chosen as the 'lucky' one to face this, I do believe everything happen for a reason. And this reason I'd like to believe is I'm here to inspire the others. 

I'm chosen cos I'm strong enough to tell the people around me, that everything's gonna be okay! And here I choose to be positive, to see the silver linings, to be grateful for every little thing, so the journey would be an easier one.

And like how my dear friend's golden wisdom goes, "This too will pass!"

So if it's not me, then who..?

...

Slight update on day 2 of admission:

Neutrophils (substance from the white blood count) is still found to be low, so the doctor has given me a booster injection for it to pickup soon. Fever still persists, blood was just withdrawn again to check if there's any new growth of bacteria. It was my first time to experience withdrawal from the groin area. In fact it's less painful, only with the lingering feeling.

Buck up please, dear body!